Do you

There is no greater feeling than freeing yourself from the negative thoughts of those around you. And while you’re at it just go ahead and free yourself from those people entirely. People are in our lives to help us, care for us, support us, believe in us, and take us farther than we ever could have thought to go on our own. Not to make us doubt ourselves, impose guilt, or make us feel the ground is made up of eggshells and we must step so carefully so as not to crack a single one. Hold your ground. Stand up for what you believe in when everyone is trying to bring you down. Make yourself happy, who gives a shit about making others happy. Don’t injure them, but don’t put their happiness before yours. Be you or forever be left feeling like a piece of you is missing.

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my first love

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“It’s funny.

The smell of the ocean.

Sweet, hot wind and sun-baked seaweed cooling as the sky darkens and steaming up the air with its salty, musty, stinging breath.

And how it looks.

Like dominant and crashing and determined. But accommodating.

I don’t know where it goes. Moving and holding more life than I can know.

Terrifying green-black hopeful abyss.

My first love I guess you could say”

– KATE HOPKINS via Thought Catalog

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16 Most Important Things Every Woman Should Learn

I started to copy and paste a few of these items before I realized I had quoted half the article. It’s so good. I have to share it in it’s entirety. Believe these words and watch your life be transformed.

infinite satori

“A woman is a beast. She is as lovely as she is repulsive. She is one part demon and one part goddess, one part slave and one part muse, one part child and one part mother. These contradictions are what makes a woman so intoxicating.”

– Andrea Mary Marshall

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Note: This not just limited to one gender, it’s for everyone. But it is, however, dedicated to the sisterhood.

To every single woman in this world, I dedicate this post to you. May we always strive to become better people.

1. To be brave and to always follow your fears.

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”- Anais Nin

If you weren’t afraid of anything, what would you do?

With courage, you are given the power to do anything in the world. We hold ourselves back so much because of fear. I’ve known so many women who have…

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Drink. Drank. Drunk. Done.

I haven’t drank in months. I mean yes, I’ve had a beer with my pizza because let’s be honest there is no greater combination, but let me specify. I haven’t drank enough to get drunk in months.

I bet you’d be surprised by this. We drank all the time. But I drank all the time because you drank all the time. And now you’re not here. And not drinking has been one of the best things to come out of our break up. I feel better. I’m more productive. I’m in better shape because Saturday mornings are spent at the gym, not nursing a hangover.

But the biggest reason I don’t get drunk anymore is because I know I can’t control myself. I will not be able to stop my fingers from searching for your name in my contacts. I will still be sober enough to know it’s not a good idea. I know I will be left feeling worse after our conversation. But then I’ll have another Whiskey Sour and all bets are off. Suddenly my phone is pressed to my hear and it’s ringing and I’m waiting for you to pick up. How bold I become with alcohol in my system! And then I will be telling you about my mom’s engagement and my thoughts and fears and you will be such a good listener, offering advice and/or support at exactly the right times, making me feel like you are mine again. And I will apologize profusely throughout the conversation and my pride will try to fight its way back in and my heart will start to harden because I don’t want to need you. But I do. I still need you. Most of the time I can convince myself that I don’t. I can be fine without you. But when alcohol brings my defenses down, I am shit out of luck. I am done for. And the next morning I will kick myself over and over for being the one to cave.  So. You are the reason I drank. You are the reason I don’t drink anymore. I am terrified of the things I’ll do. I cannot lose control in fear of the situations I’ll find myself in.

 

By the way. I hope I used correct terms here in regards to drank, drunk, drink, etc. This kind of stuff stresses me out.

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“Learn the difference between quitting and accepting an ending.” – Rob Hill Sr

Easier said than done, Mr. Rob Hill Sr. This is one of the major life lessons I’ve learned (am still learning) this past year. How does one ever really know the difference between giving up and realizing you are meant to travel a different road?  I suppose you start with a list of pros and cons. And you imagine yourself in each situation and decide which feels better. And you wait. And the answer will come in it’s own time. But I don’t think it ever gets easier. With every circumstance there will  be doubt, confusion, fear, worry. Embrace it anyway. And keep in mind that ultimately you will end up exactly where you’re meant to be.

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Well, time has a way of throwing it all in your face
The past, she is haunted, the future is laced
Heartbreak, ya know, drives a big black car
I swear I was in the back seat,
just minding my own

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No Regrets

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